Crossroads...
I never realized almost five years ago the significance of the changes I was about to go through. Five years ago, I was bracing for a change in ministry. The Church that had hired me to serve an their Youth and Children's Pastor could no longer afford the position and I was being downsized. At the time I mourned the loss mostly because the ministry was so important to me and the students I was serving were so dear to me. It was one of the hardest things I had ever been through but we packed up the office and closed the door on that stage of life. I expected that God would automatically open another door somewhere so that I could once again work with students in what I see as a vital ministry for the Church.
At the time I had not thought that the fact my daughter was entering her senior year in High School would be a big factor. But it was. At the end of the summer I had turned down a couple of positions and been turned down by a couple. It was one thing to move before the school year, but it was another to move during her senior year. My wife and I choose not to move, which meant not to pursue a new ministry until the next summer.
The next summer was a completely different year. For one thing the recession was in full swing and so jobs in churches were fewer. For another, I had been out of ministry for over a year. No one wants to hire someone who has been out of work for that long. My options were few and I was at a crossroads. In some regard I am still there.
It was during this time that I began to look for ways to improve my chances. My wife encouraged me to pursue seminary. At first I thought the idea was impossible. I had no undergrad degree and I did not see getting into seminary as an option. But God opened the doors at Multnomah Seminary. They had provisions for people in my situation. I needed to show significant experience and I needed to prove I was capable of doing the work by taking and passing the GRE (Graduate Records Exam). I had the experience and after several weeks of preparation I passed my GRE with high marks. This began my seminary life. I completed my Master of Arts degree in two years and graduated with honors. During that time also took on the point responsibilities of the Middle School ministry.
A few months after graduation, while in the application process at a couple of churches, I was asked to step into the role of Interim Children's Ministry Director at the church. It was a challenge and I jumped in with both feet. For the the past few months I have been focusing a large portion of my time on helping the Children's ministry become more misssional around the vision of the church. In my spare time I still help coordinate the middle school. It has been a great opportunity and could go in for several more months.
I never realized almost five years ago the significance of the changes I was about to go through. Five years ago, I was bracing for a change in ministry. The Church that had hired me to serve an their Youth and Children's Pastor could no longer afford the position and I was being downsized. At the time I mourned the loss mostly because the ministry was so important to me and the students I was serving were so dear to me. It was one of the hardest things I had ever been through but we packed up the office and closed the door on that stage of life. I expected that God would automatically open another door somewhere so that I could once again work with students in what I see as a vital ministry for the Church.
At the time I had not thought that the fact my daughter was entering her senior year in High School would be a big factor. But it was. At the end of the summer I had turned down a couple of positions and been turned down by a couple. It was one thing to move before the school year, but it was another to move during her senior year. My wife and I choose not to move, which meant not to pursue a new ministry until the next summer.
The next summer was a completely different year. For one thing the recession was in full swing and so jobs in churches were fewer. For another, I had been out of ministry for over a year. No one wants to hire someone who has been out of work for that long. My options were few and I was at a crossroads. In some regard I am still there.
It was during this time that I began to look for ways to improve my chances. My wife encouraged me to pursue seminary. At first I thought the idea was impossible. I had no undergrad degree and I did not see getting into seminary as an option. But God opened the doors at Multnomah Seminary. They had provisions for people in my situation. I needed to show significant experience and I needed to prove I was capable of doing the work by taking and passing the GRE (Graduate Records Exam). I had the experience and after several weeks of preparation I passed my GRE with high marks. This began my seminary life. I completed my Master of Arts degree in two years and graduated with honors. During that time also took on the point responsibilities of the Middle School ministry.
A few months after graduation, while in the application process at a couple of churches, I was asked to step into the role of Interim Children's Ministry Director at the church. It was a challenge and I jumped in with both feet. For the the past few months I have been focusing a large portion of my time on helping the Children's ministry become more misssional around the vision of the church. In my spare time I still help coordinate the middle school. It has been a great opportunity and could go in for several more months.
Recently I realized that I am still standing at the crossroads. I went to seminary to become a better student ministry pastor. My heart is to work with High School students. I am capable of doing Children's Ministry with excellence but my heart is not fully engaged. I long for a ministry to students that trains them and empowers them to change their world.
I know that if I pursued the position that I am in, there is a good chance that they would ask me to be the permanent Children's pastor. There is a certain security in that thought. I love kids and I could see myself in the role. But my heart longs for working with older students. But I have no leads or any guarantees that I will ever land a Student Ministry position again. I am fighting against a prejudice that says that Student Ministry pastors should be in their twenties or thirties. I know that someday I may be to old to work with Students but I am not there yet. In truth I am still as excited about students as I have ever been. I still connect with them and I still prefer Student Ministry to anything else.
I have a choice before me. I can pour myself into the ministry at hand or I can pour myself into finding a new position as Student Ministry pastor. My dilemma is frustrating. My solution is to wait. I need to wait upon the Lord. He opened the door where I am. He will sustain me and meet my needs. I am asking Him to provide a ministry to High School students or to provide a heart for the ministry I am in currently. I think I can wait here for him to answer.
He has never let me down before.
I know that if I pursued the position that I am in, there is a good chance that they would ask me to be the permanent Children's pastor. There is a certain security in that thought. I love kids and I could see myself in the role. But my heart longs for working with older students. But I have no leads or any guarantees that I will ever land a Student Ministry position again. I am fighting against a prejudice that says that Student Ministry pastors should be in their twenties or thirties. I know that someday I may be to old to work with Students but I am not there yet. In truth I am still as excited about students as I have ever been. I still connect with them and I still prefer Student Ministry to anything else.
I have a choice before me. I can pour myself into the ministry at hand or I can pour myself into finding a new position as Student Ministry pastor. My dilemma is frustrating. My solution is to wait. I need to wait upon the Lord. He opened the door where I am. He will sustain me and meet my needs. I am asking Him to provide a ministry to High School students or to provide a heart for the ministry I am in currently. I think I can wait here for him to answer.
He has never let me down before.
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